it’s always you in my big dreams

3 Aug

On October 23rd of 2009, I sent myself an email to save so that in the future I could read it and wonder some more. The title of the email is quote from my dream and the message reads: “You know how we look through the grill? Well, I do  think we’re filled with destruction and sadness, but I could never do that to you.” I very much regret that I still don’t know what it means. I was thinking that maybe you folks could help me out. What would this mean if it was said to you? What in the world could the first sentence mean? And why is it worded so strangely? The easy thing to do, would be to say, “It was a dream. And in your dreams weird things often happen that no one will ever make sense of. That is the beauty of dreams.” But I won’t accept any of it. And save the talk about the subconscious, because I’ve subconsciously explored my subconscious, and even my projections* don’t understand.

I know my dreams are special and are supposed to mean something when I wake up crying or when certain words or phrases won’t let me go. So I write them down, and hope that by doing so I am one step closer to solving some Grand Mystery. A long time ago, I dreamt of the word chantilly without knowing what it was. The next morning I Googled it, and Chris gave me some strawberries, and I thought I could find answers in a strawberry chantilly dessert. But I mixed up the brown sugar with the white sugar and I felt that I had ruined everything, so I decided that strawberry chantilly was not the chantilly for me. Wikipedia lists fourteen articles associated with chantilly, but I need more clues to narrow my choices!

Dreams are complicated. I feel like I am on a mission. Any dream clues that you’ve stumbled on would probably help with my investigation. My asking is a sign for you to share them. I think we can help each other crack this case!

* Inception reference!


4 Responses to “it’s always you in my big dreams”

  1. Chris K. August 4, 2011 at 1:06 am #

    i can understand the first part of it..but the 2nd not so much. looking thru the grates on a grill could be like looking into someone’s heart or their eyes. ..and seeing that in their heart is destruction and sadness. Thats taking into account everything that could happen and does happen in someones life..and the thoughts that move about in their heads as they feel a large array of emotions. perhaps in the 2nd part is talking about how you can’t see that when u look into the person (whomever you were thinking about at the time). Dreams are indeed amazing. I love to dream.

    • jenibo August 4, 2011 at 7:56 pm #

      Grill. That word is bothersome.

  2. Matty August 4, 2011 at 4:28 pm #

    The first thing that popped into my head:

    These are the ghosts of two animals floating up through a grill, looking at their former bodies roasting. They are struck by the sadness and destructiveness of life on earth, and pledge not to do this to each other in their next lives.

    (In another life they meet at a vegetarian expo, find they’re soul mates, and for the rest of their lives can’t shake the feeling that they were once very close, even before they met.)

    [see also the Gates of horn and ivory (

    • jenibo August 4, 2011 at 7:54 pm #


      I love the gates of horn and ivory! I don’t think I’ve heard of them before. I love, love, love it though. I think I’m going to dream about them now.

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