I learned that being a friend, takes a lot of time and commitment. We always were together. Being a friend is cool. You have to listen to your friends. You have to help them fix their problems. Your friends also will do the same if you are nice to them. You feel safer when you have a friend. It is nice to know that someone counts and you and that you can count on someone too.
Now, I guess, I almost sort of regret that I always said Zayn was tied for last as my favorite member of One Direction. Because I realize that without him, without Liam, even, the band does not exist. I mean, it does, technically, but not in the way it did, the way it should, or ever will again. And I’m closer to thirty than I am to sixteen so maybe they’re not as much mine as maybe NSYNC should have been, but no. They are. And I’m young and sad, and it’s heartbreaking to see them separate.
we’d seen a lot of episodes before. bits and pieces throughout the series. don’t usually feel i should like a show until i’ve seen it from the beginning. every episode. in order. because i’m tired and i’ve been tired all month, after completing the first season in criminal minds, i have only common and expected comments, i think. the first of which is that i now want to be in the behavioral analysis unit. i want to be a profiler in the BAU, and i want to figure you out. i thought i didn’t like elle, but i think i like her now. she’s strong and brave, and i appreciate that. in one of the episodes in the middle of the first season, she had bangs that i did not like, but they were gone by the next episode and her eyeliner is always pretty good. spencer reid is the best, and everyone knows it. jennifer jareau is not my favorite, not at all, and i’m not sure if my mind can be changed about her. and jason gideon does have kind eyes. my favorite episode this season was “riding the lightning,” and this is the end of my season one review.
I worry all the time that my life narrative won’t make sense if I don’t write down now what I’m feeling and what I think about how I feel and what I think I should feel about that. But when I’m tired or lazy, or when I miss a day of blogging when I thought I wouldn’t, I like to zoom out a little, take a step back and remember that I wouldn’t have liked myself very much anyway if when I’m forty-two I find journals from my twenties and read that I’m unsatisfied with my job, I spent the weekend watching Netflix, and I’m too emotionally invested in One Direction as a quintet to dwell much on Zayn’s hiatus. So, I mean, it wouldn’t be terrible if I just said less.
It’s finally Friday and I have no plans except to lie on the couch with Daniel and pizza and maybe a Criminal Minds marathon on Netflix. I’ve been looking forward to this all week. I look forward to it every day it’s not the weekend. School was much of the same. If I ever reach it, I wonder what retirement will be like.
Maybe someday I’ll have an excuse for why my blog has been so lame.